I Like Being a Hermit
I like being a hermit.
There are things I do not like about a global pandemic. I think those things are (should be) fairly obvious: death, trauma, inequity, systemic racism, uncertainty of safety, long-term illness, increase in mental health concerns, financial instability, lack of basic needs being met, fear, loneliness, disconnection, unknowns, and the list goes on.
On a small, day-to-day scale, there are things I really do like about this time of isolation. I know that this is largely a position of privilege and I do not take that awareness lightly. However, I wanted to share my thoughts on this in case, like me, you start to feel a little nervous when people exclaim, “I can’t wait to go back to normal!”
As an introvert, I feel really good about not *having* to go anywhere. Homebase is comfortable for me, and alone time recharges my battery. This extended time at home has my battery fully charged. It feels oddly wonderful.
You see, I might be somewhat of an odd introvert, in that I’m also passionate about helping others feel their best. In my world of psychotherapy, yoga, and retreats this means that I see A LOT of people for work. And I love it. It makes me feel alive and whole. I also love my friends and family and love to spot free-time on my calendar to schedule important time with them. My husband has historically given me a hard time about that common practice, “you see a free weekend on the calendar and immediately try to fill it with something”. Guilty.
It’s weird that I do that, because I love and cherish hermiting.
Waking up slowly in the dark winter mornings with just my 1-year old, husband, and our pets. Cozy, quiet snuggles by the fireplace. Slipping off to my “meditation corner” for my morning ritual: my ultimate quiet introvert time. Having breakfast together as a family. Taking breaks from work with walks outside together. More time to focus on my own health: running outside, yoga, meditation, journaling. More time to entertain impromptu backyard fires and letting the baby “bake” aka get flour all over the kitchen. Ice skating and ice fishing dates with my husband. Zero social pressure, and plenty of blank space on the calendar. Not having to drive anywhere, especially in a Minnesota winter. More time to focus on what’s important in life. This here, right now. This is all there is. As a family, I feel we are making it count in a beautiful way.
I love hermiting. I must admit though that when it’s safe, I will happily give everyone a long-awaited comfortable hug, chit chat with you in each other’s homes, have weekends away and little kiddo playdates. I will relish in every bit of in-person yoga. I know that I will jump back into the deep end of social life when it’s safe to do so. Somehow though, I would still like to hang on to a bit of this introvert magic myself and my family have been fortunate enough to cultivate. Will I now be able to see a free weekend for what it is (GOLD!), rather than try to fill it?
Lastly, on a more serious global level, I think it’s important to recognize that 2020 is telling us something. There was heartache, uproar, knowledge, change, and growth. I hope to continue to listen and transform. The below quote by Sonya Renee Taylor is both validating to me and an important reminder - “Normal never was….we are being given the opportunity to stitch a new garment.”
Bryana Cook, LICSW, E-RYT 200, RYT 500, YACEP
Owner of Northern Yoga and Wellness and co-owner of Boreal Bliss Yoga Retreats